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Ask Anne: Relationship AdviceAsk Anne:
Relationship Questions

Potentially Suicidal Boyfriend

Tue, Nov 14th 2000

I have a question that concerns my boyfriend. He is depressed. But his depression doesn't show around me. My best friend told me that he has depression and once in his life he tried to commit suicide.. And suicide is a really hard subject for me to talk about (I lost a friend from suicide) and the last thing I want is my boyfriend to feel that is the only way out! He doesn't like to talk about it.. I mean, I will ask him what is wrong and he will be like nothing. And thanks to my friend I know what is wrong with him. I am scared to lose him in more ways than a "break up." I want him to be happy and know that I care about him.. I don't know how to do that. When I ask him what is wrong and he says nothing and I just drop it because I don't want to be a controlling, nosey, annoying little girlfriend. But this depression concern about him keeps me up all night just worrying about him.. Wondering if he is okay. I really love him and I will do anything to help him. I did all this depression research and taught myself somewhat what some of the thoughts he might be having so I can sort of understand what he is going through. Because he doesn't tell me anything about it! So I feel like I am so helpless and unable to help him in his problems because I am unable to understand what he is going through because he seems to not want me to know.. Like it will make me sad or hate him. And yes I would get upset, but that is just because he is upset about it! But I could never HATE him.. And he seems not to believe that. I have gone on and on. Basically, I am really concerned and I want to help him through it or even out of it, because he is apart of my life and I would give anything for him to be better!

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